Where is the True Value in Forum?

On any given day, I have somewhere in the realm of 10-12 meetings. Sometimes more, sometimes fewer, depending on how long they are. I don’t think I am alone in that number. And, of course, not all meetings are created equal - we all know that some of them could have been an email. But how would one even begin to assign a value to meetings? What kind of scale would one use? For me, I judge all meetings against the highest value meeting - the Forum.

For context, I have been a member of YPO for some years now, and I was a part of EO before that. I have been part of many a peer group over the years, all of which have included some form of Forum.

Where is the True Value in Forum?

On any given day, I have somewhere in the realm of 10-12 meetings. Sometimes more, sometimes fewer, depending on how long they are. I don’t think I am alone in that number. And, of course, not all meetings are created equal - we all know that some of them could have been an email. But how would one even begin to assign a value to meetings? What kind of scale would one use? For me, I judge all meetings against the highest value meeting - the Forum.

For context, I have been a member of YPO for some years now, and I was a part of EO before that. I have been part of many a peer group over the years, all of which have included some form of Forum.

Not Just a Meeting - Forum Gives the Value of Time

Yes, yes, technically, Forum is a meeting. There is an agenda, a scheduled time, and everyone gets a chance to talk. However, Forum is more than just that. I would say that, in my experience, Forum is the highest-value ‘meeting’ one could attend. Of course, I don’t mean in monetary terms - we’re not making a sale here. No, the true value of Forum lies in time. I think that, if one were to ask the majority of CEOs what their most precious resource is, they’d all say time. And because Forum demands presence, you are giving up this precious time in order to show up for your Forum mates, as well as yourself.

I remember walking into my very first Forum meeting. It was me and a bunch of people who felt entirely too intimidating and impressive. I remember thinking, “What am I doing here?” But then everyone put their phones away, and the session started. Suddenly, we were all zoned in and listening. I felt like, if all these impressive, busy people could take the time, then so could I.

If you consider the lifespan of most Forums in YPO, you’d be looking at around 20 years’ worth of monthly meetings. And that does not include emergency get-togethers or events with Forum mates. It truly is an investment in one another over the course of decades. We all agree to put down our phones, ignore our emails, and shut out the rest of the world for the duration of our meeting. It gives us a chance to reflect and to offer assistance where needed.

Not Just a Meeting - Forum Gives the Value of Time

Yes, yes, technically, Forum is a meeting. There is an agenda, a scheduled time, and everyone gets a chance to talk. However, Forum is more than just that. I would say that, in my experience, Forum is the highest-value ‘meeting’ one could attend. Of course, I don’t mean in monetary terms - we’re not making a sale here. No, the true value of Forum lies in time. I think that, if one were to ask the majority of CEOs what their most precious resource is, they’d all say time. And because Forum demands presence, you are giving up this precious time in order to show up for your Forum mates, as well as yourself.

I remember walking into my very first Forum meeting. It was me and a bunch of people who felt entirely too intimidating and impressive. I remember thinking, “What am I doing here?” But then everyone put their phones away, and the session started. Suddenly, we were all zoned in and listening. I felt like, if all these impressive, busy people could take the time, then so could I.

If you consider the lifespan of most Forums in YPO, you’d be looking at around 20 years’ worth of monthly meetings. And that does not include emergency get-togethers or events with Forum mates. It truly is an investment in one another over the course of decades. We all agree to put down our phones, ignore our emails, and shut out the rest of the world for the duration of our meeting. It gives us a chance to reflect and to offer assistance where needed.

Putting Things Into Perspective

The value of Forum doesn’t only lie in time-spend. It also offers up perspective.

Picture this: you’re having a rough day work-wise. You have a thousand emails, all of which require a response. One of your top priorities has had to take a back seat because you are busy dealing with a difficult client. Your finance department is all off sick, and your new shoes are giving you blisters. All rather frustrating. You jump onto your Forum meeting, feeling a little worse for wear, and one of your Forum mates brings up a challenge around having to let go of over 50 employees. They know it needs to be done, but they are concerned for the well-being of these employees and their families in this challenging time.

Suddenly, our difficulties don’t seem too difficult.

It’s very easy for me to get wrapped up in my own world - after all, I’m living my life, not anyone else’s. And it’s also very easy to allow my own hardships to weigh me down. That is not to say that we shouldn’t feel what we feel about our own challenges. However, when I hear about what others are experiencing, it becomes easier to refocus and reframe what I am feeling. I have always found that, when I am helping someone, my fears and concerns for my own problems seem less. I remember one Forum meeting where I was frustrated with a visa process that I was dealing with at the time. We then explored a challenge (that I won’t repeat) and I thought to myself, “gees, how could I let something so mundane be such a worry for me when others are dealing with much greater issues?” I quickly changed my tune about my visa woes.

And this is the beauty of Forum. Not only does it give perspective, it also lends perspective to others. Going back to the first example mentioned (which is entirely hypothetical, by the way, my shoes fit great.) The Forum mate had to let go of his employees. Not only did my perspective on my own challenges change, but I was able to offer him an experience share around how I dealt with a similar situation. He was then able to listen to all of us, hear about how we’ve tackled problems of equal magnitude, and take comfort and assistance from that. Perhaps he found a solution from us talking, or perhaps he simply found peace with his decision. Either way, everyone at the meeting was unburdened in some way.

Putting Things Into Perspective

The value of Forum doesn’t only lie in time-spend. It also offers up perspective.

Picture this: you’re having a rough day work-wise. You have a thousand emails, all of which require a response. One of your top priorities has had to take a back seat because you are busy dealing with a difficult client. Your finance department is all off sick, and your new shoes are giving you blisters. All rather frustrating. You jump onto your Forum meeting, feeling a little worse for wear, and one of your Forum mates brings up a challenge around having to let go of over 50 employees. They know it needs to be done, but they are concerned for the well-being of these employees and their families in this challenging time.

Suddenly, our difficulties don’t seem too difficult.

It’s very easy for me to get wrapped up in my own world - after all, I’m living my life, not anyone else’s. And it’s also very easy to allow my own hardships to weigh me down. That is not to say that we shouldn’t feel what we feel about our own challenges. However, when I hear about what others are experiencing, it becomes easier to refocus and reframe what I am feeling. I have always found that, when I am helping someone, my fears and concerns for my own problems seem less. I remember one Forum meeting where I was frustrated with a visa process that I was dealing with at the time. We then explored a challenge (that I won’t repeat) and I thought to myself, “gees, how could I let something so mundane be such a worry for me when others are dealing with much greater issues?” I quickly changed my tune about my visa woes.

And this is the beauty of Forum. Not only does it give perspective, it also lends perspective to others. Going back to the first example mentioned (which is entirely hypothetical, by the way, my shoes fit great.) The Forum mate had to let go of his employees. Not only did my perspective on my own challenges change, but I was able to offer him an experience share around how I dealt with a similar situation. He was then able to listen to all of us, hear about how we’ve tackled problems of equal magnitude, and take comfort and assistance from that. Perhaps he found a solution from us talking, or perhaps he simply found peace with his decision. Either way, everyone at the meeting was unburdened in some way.

Getting Comfortable with the Good and the Bad

Apart from the time and the perspective that Forum offers, I think it is also a great lesson in going deep. As Forum members, we need to get comfortable with sharing the good, the bad, and everything in between. And we have to get comfortable fast! In order not to waste the valuable resource that is time, I found myself needing to share deeply on issues almost from the jump. Of course, one gets more comfortable over time; however, everyone enters the meetings knowing that it will get deep quickly.

The great thing about it, though, is that it’s not only shared grief or hardship. It is also shared joy. When good things happened to my Forum mates, the joy was tenfold because I had been with them each step of the way. I witnessed their tears, and then got to celebrate their laughter. And I knew that, no matter what I brought to the table, there would be zero judgment and 100% support.

One example that I can share of this is about an ex-forum mate. We’re still close friends to this day, and he recently welcomed a brand new baby. Despite no longer being in Forum together, we still connect regularly, and I was very happy to receive the news of his little one.

Getting Comfortable with the Good and the Bad

Apart from the time and the perspective that Forum offers, I think it is also a great lesson in going deep. As Forum members, we need to get comfortable with sharing the good, the bad, and everything in between. And we have to get comfortable fast! In order not to waste the valuable resource that is time, I found myself needing to share deeply on issues almost from the jump. Of course, one gets more comfortable over time; however, everyone enters the meetings knowing that it will get deep quickly.

The great thing about it, though, is that it’s not only shared grief or hardship. It is also shared joy. When good things happened to my Forum mates, the joy was tenfold because I had been with them each step of the way. I witnessed their tears, and then got to celebrate their laughter. And I knew that, no matter what I brought to the table, there would be zero judgment and 100% support.

One example that I can share of this is about an ex-forum mate. We’re still close friends to this day, and he recently welcomed a brand new baby. Despite no longer being in Forum together, we still connect regularly, and I was very happy to receive the news of his little one.

So, What is the True Value?

Would it be cheesy to say, “the friends we made along the way”? Probably. But it’s not wrong. I think the truest value of Forum lies in the connections we make. I’ve seen it time and again: the more effort that people put into their peer groups, the more they get out of them. And oftentimes, it ends up being the relationships forged in Forum that are the biggest prize. The people I have met through Forums have remained constant in my life, and as someone who up and moved his entire existence to a new country a few years ago, that has been truly invaluable.

I’m truly not sure that I would be where I am today without my Forum experiences. My circle here in London would be much smaller, and my challenges would seem much greater. And, despite not currently being a part of a Forum, I know that I use the methods I learned almost daily.

About the Author

Edward Dalton is the CEO of Noon Dalton, delivering a secure, sustainable alternative to traditional recruitment for mid-market corporations, private equity portfolios, and venture capital funds. Edward has significant experience in supplying remote staff to companies of all kinds, and he uses his insights to provide Noon Dalton’s clients with valuable advice. He continually fine-tunes strategy and encourages staff to develop new proposals that will benefit the team. Fresh ideas, paired with a strong foundation in consulting and remote team management, ensure that the firm’s customer relationships stay strong. Edward sits on the board and is a member of YPO, the Virtual Advisory Board, and served as Membership Chair of the London Board of Entrepreneurs’ Organization. He also holds memberships to British American Business and Lanserhof at the Arts Club in London.

So, What is the True Value?

Would it be cheesy to say, “the friends we made along the way”? Probably. But it’s not wrong. I think the truest value of Forum lies in the connections we make. I’ve seen it time and again: the more effort that people put into their peer groups, the more they get out of them. And oftentimes, it ends up being the relationships forged in Forum that are the biggest prize. The people I have met through Forums have remained constant in my life, and as someone who up and moved his entire existence to a new country a few years ago, that has been truly invaluable.

I’m truly not sure that I would be where I am today without my Forum experiences. My circle here in London would be much smaller, and my challenges would seem much greater. And, despite not currently being a part of a Forum, I know that I use the methods I learned almost daily.

About the Author

Edward Dalton is the CEO of Noon Dalton, delivering a secure, sustainable alternative to traditional recruitment for mid-market corporations, private equity portfolios, and venture capital funds. Edward has significant experience in supplying remote staff to companies of all kinds, and he uses his insights to provide Noon Dalton’s clients with valuable advice. He continually fine-tunes strategy and encourages staff to develop new proposals that will benefit the team. Fresh ideas, paired with a strong foundation in consulting and remote team management, ensure that the firm’s customer relationships stay strong. Edward sits on the board and is a member of YPO, the Virtual Advisory Board, and served as Membership Chair of the London Board of Entrepreneurs’ Organization. He also holds memberships to British American Business and Lanserhof at the Arts Club in London.